5:20PM, Jul 17, 2009
To the naysayers who have said Big Brother's lost its buzz, just have a look at this week's shenanigans and try saying that again.
Protests, house-wide revolt, old faces, shock revelations and hilarious tasks all unfolded during BB's tenth anniversary birthday week.
While the housemates may have been moaning for the last few weeks about the lack of food, booze and cigarettes, Big Brother unleashed a punishment worse than.... well, if we're comparing it to the aforementioned, starvation.
Housemates from series past! Aaargh! If only they had accompanied each entrance with dramatic organ music, an orchestral crescendo and fake lightning, it would've been perfect.
As it was though, the housemates were subjected to BB7's Nikki 'WHO IS SHE' Grahame, one woman Eurotrash tribute Michelle Bass from BB5, BB9's Rex and happy handyman Craig from BB1, who each took part in re-enactments of tasks from their time in the house.
While Michelle and Nikki provided enough 'will she/won't she attack the housemates with the nearest wieldable weapon' tension, it was Craig's entrance (after fittingly replacing Nasty Nick who pulled out over payment issues) that provided the warmest, fuzziest memories and reminded us all of BB's legacy.
Housemates On Strike
Of course, while the current housemates ooh-ed, aw-ed and fawned over the 'celebs' in the house, the group-huggery didn't last long and with the excitement fading, the group (led by the suitably feral-looking Marcus) threw their toys literally out of the pram over the lack of food and booze.
Marcus led Noirin, Charlie and Freddie on an expedition to the heady heights of the Big Brother roof, and quickly scaled the walls of the garden.
While Big Brother rather feebly demanded that they descend to the garden floor, Noirin cried that she wanted cigarettes and food, while the others shouted for more alcohol.
The housemates eventually backed down when Big Brother threatened to kick them out of the house, although Siavash took a little longer than most due to his fear of heights.
To further prove the point, Freddie led a silent protest against Big Brother, although Karly, Rodrigo and Lisa soon gave up.
Jacko & Eviction Upset
In an emotionally charged week, the housemates were also made aware of two other shocking announcements.
Firstly, Siavash and Dogface found themselves up for eviction after failing a slap-on-the-wrist challenge from Big Brother. The autonomous authority had told the pair that they had to abstain from swearing for a set period after discussing nominations. The pair, predictably, failed to reign in their potty mouths and Big Brother punished them by placing them on automatic nomination notice.
When it came to the house-nominated selection though, Karly and Noirin both received five nominations (leaving Marcus and Lisa just one shy with four) and miraculously Freddie didn't receive even one.
Looks like his theory on Kris' monopolistic 'cool' reign was spot on.
As if that wasn't traumatic enough, Noirin found out that Michael Jackson had died after BB4's Rodrigo blurted it out during his task with the housemates. With speculation spreading like wildfire, Noirin was told by Big Brother that she was allowed to inform the group of the news.
Ooh! Five New Housemates!
Finally, Davina's mischievous declaration during last week's live eviction that there would be new housemates entering the house is looking to become a reality this evening!
The Sun has reported that five new housemates will enter the house shortly after tonight's eviction. These will include a typically diverse (some would say bonkers) selection of characters, including a jet-setting playboy (Kris is already jealous), a camp northerner, a rugby-playing Tory, a bohemian who believes in having more than one lover (can anyone say 'Freddie'?) and a Muslim fashion designer (we're envisaging dress-offs with Siavash).
Bring it on!
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