3:20PM, Jul 10, 2009
For Big Brother's tenth year housemates are experiencing pre-birthday anxiety with arguments, promises of cameos appearances, more arguments, people acting like pillocks and still more arguments.
Happy Birthday Big Bro - they're baaack!
As with all great birthdays, it's near-compulsory to have at least one or two shockers, with a 'blast from the past' riding high on the list of delightful/terrifying surprises.
We've heard exclusive rumblings here at TV Towers that 'memorable' former housemates will return to the house every day from Sunday until Friday.
However, what with the term 'memorable' hazily translating to anything between 'funniest', 'winners' and 'most annoying', we shouldn't be surprised to hear that Nikki "Who IS she?" Grahame from Big Brother 7 will be the first to enter the house.
Each BB veteran will allegedly take part in a challenge against one of the current housemates as part of the show's tenth anniversary.
While we're probably a little ambitious to hope for ex-Celeb BB housemates (Vanessa and Pete Burns locked in a small room together - TV Gold surely?), the ultimate BB pantomime villain, Nasty Nick from BB1, could prove the stand-out after commenting on his Twitter page that he could be doing a C4 task next week.
The Famous Five
This week's housemate-voted nominations were utterly predictable, with hapless Freddie (can the boy do nothing right?) and walking argument Marcus up for the chop.
The rather interesting twist this time around comes from the fact that Charlie, Kris and Sophie (Dogface) were also put forward after discussing nominations and then subsequently failing to adhere to Big Brother's lenient 'get-out clause'.
After a stern verbal smack on the wrist, Big Brother said that the trio could avoid the public vote if they managed to stay completely silent for an extended period of time.
But, lacking either common sense or base-line motor-neuron functions, the trio squeaked, hummed and mm-hmm-ed their way around the house for the entiriety of the duration and were promptly nominated.
Unsurprisingly, moody petulant pretty-boy grump Kris is odds-on favourite to go with Sky Bet giving odds of 1/10 that he'll be the one booted this evening.
Noirin vs Siavash (Round One)
While those five are up for nomination for now, this week's big barney between the normally placid Siavash and Noirin guarantees that at least one of them will be up for eviction next week. Trust us, we've seen it in the stars (and the paper-thin death stares being flung around the place).
It all began in the traditionally innocuous Big Brother way, with Siavash casually commenting that there were those in the house that saw Noirin as a 'bunny' who hopped from social group to social group with flirtatious abandon.
To be fair, he has a point.
But Noirin isn't one to take it lying down, and got on her righteous beauty paegant horse to declare war on all and sundry who dared call her manipulative.
Karly and Kris were somehow accused of being those who originally labelled her 'flopsy' and before long, crossed wires had exploded into fiery arguments and spiteful bickering. The house's pressure-cooker atmosphere boiled over to the point where there were two decisive sides, culminating with Siavash and Noirin spitting that they'd never talk to each other again.
We're already putting bets on a Nikki/Noirin cat-fight.
Find out when Big Brother is next on TV.
